By: Emeka Love
These days, falling in love with the opposite sex is something that happens childishly. When a brother by chance gets to meet a sister he likes, maybe in an occasion or a pleasant gathering, the next thing that follows, is falling in love. And I see many of our brothers attending different occasions just to seek for a lady to fall in love with. Even when they are not invited, they dress up, stroll in and all they do is to fix their eyes and attention on ladies. Not considering the fact that many ladies also dress to kill for that same purpose. They also would not consider the fact that they could only see the facial beauty and outward appearance of a lady not her real being. Most single ladies are at their best in ocassion, so if one should follow them because of what he sees outwardly, he is on his own. Please don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you can’t meet the will of God in such an occasion, all I’m saying is that, when the time to get married comes, dressing smartly and going for ocassion just to see if you can hook up with a lady or a guy is not the right thing to do. Doing this means, going before God to get your will and not His will.
This is what actually happens before dating begins, and this is what makes dating a wrong way of beginning a relationship with the opposite sex no matter how pure that relationship is before God. Funny enough, some people involved in this, will still be asking God if the people they are dating is His will, whereas, they made the choice themselves. Even when they are messing themselves up daily, they are still praying to know if that is the will of God for them. Isn’t this foolishness?
Sorry, you may not like this, but that is the simple truth concerning the errors of dating. You don’t fall in love before you seek the face of God concerning the person. You don’t fall in love casually, you follow the plans of God and His leading, then delibrately walk into love with your eyes wide open so that you can clearly observe the things that are going on in that relationship and know how to handle them. When you lead yourself into a relationship with the opposite sex, no matter how spiritual you both are, you are likely to sleep together before marriage, this is due to your weakness towards sexual pressure. And because it was not God that initiated that relationship, that weakness in you was not dealt with by God before the relationship started.
This is why it surprises some Christian brothers or sisters who are highly spiritual, but yet, their spirituality could not stop them from sleeping together with their partner. They were thinking they could control themselves, after all, they were strong spiritually, not knowing that in this issue of premarital sex, once you are weak, you are weak. This is why you needed to allow God to strengthen your weakness and that of your future partner before bringing you both together, not just jumping into one because friends are doing that or already married. My dear, it is not the first to get married that succeeds in it o!
Beloved, you need to solely depend on God concerning this issue of marriage. Don’t take it for granted, or start making some immature statement like many people do. Statement like… ”God will not send my partner from heaven so let me go and look for him/her.” Or start quoting the scripture that says ”He who finds a wife..,” wait a minute, do you find a wife with your physical eyes? If you see your wife or husband to be physically without God’s leading, how can you identify him/her? It is because many could not identify their future partner, this is why they sort for an alternative, which they call dating. A true Christian who hears and follows God’s leading will never depend on dating, because even when he/she date for 10years, it is still not the will of God, because it wasn’t God that chose nor brought them together.
As a Christian, you only make use of your physical eyes, to see the sister or brother God will reveal to you spiritually. If He doesn’t reveal him/her to you in anyway, then He will direct you to them, He will order your footsteps very well and ensure you meet them at the right time. When you meet them, He will definitely speak to you in one way or the other, this is how God works, and this is the foundation of a godly relationship.